| To be or not to be: that IS the question. | | | | embarrassment than anything else that was |
| I was in a bit of a pickle. I had a heat resistant | | | | getting to me. I always thought that I was in |
| mat that I needed to put under my woodstove | | | | good shape, I mean, I usually run about 35 |
| before I could use it, but there was no way that | | | | Kilometers a week, but I guess I'm not. The |
| I could put it there myself. In order to do that I | | | | more I thought about it, the more inadequate I |
| would have to lift the woodstove, slide the pad in | | | | felt. I just wanted to be stronger so that I could |
| to the exact place and then lower the 400 pound | | | | at least lift my half of the 400+ pounds. |
| woodstove down gently so as to not dent the | | | | Have you ever felt inadequate when you |
| pad or the floor. | | | | compared yourself to others? Like you just didn't |
| I sat at my kitchen table trying to think of the | | | | measure up to your own expectations, and you |
| biggest, strongest people I knew that could help | | | | pretended to be someone who you weren't? We |
| me, and hope that they were available at that | | | | are all sometimes intimidated by other people's |
| time. Then I thought, I know, I'll call Neville! He | | | | abilities like confidence, communications skills, |
| knows everyone, and he may be able to help too! | | | | knowledge or even their looks. This desire to "be |
| True to Neville's form, he knew someone who | | | | like them" drives us to do rash things to our |
| could help me... himself and his son Josiah. | | | | bodies and sometimes to our relationships. What is |
| So, here we were in my dining room, Neville and I | | | | this need that we sometimes seem to have to |
| on each side of the woodstove, Josiah in front | | | | compare ourselves to others and wish we had |
| ready to push the pad in, "OK" I said, "On three. | | | | what they had? How many times have we heard |
| One... two... three... lift!" "hnnnngggggghhhh..." I | | | | about some young teen girl who became |
| groaned "it's no use" I said, as I tried, to no avail | | | | anorexic, just to look like someone that she saw |
| to lift my side off the floor, while Neville's side | | | | in a magazine, or another person who joined a |
| easily rose to 8 to 10 inches, "I can't lift this!" I | | | | gang, just to fit in, or another person who took |
| whined. "There has to be a better way!" | | | | up drinking or doing drugs, just to be accepted? |
| "I know" I said, "I'll just make a fulcrum, and then | | | | Of course, we all want to be accepted, and often |
| I'll be able to do it" | | | | we will do things that we wouldn't normally do, |
| Off I ran to get the material that I needed. I | | | | just to get that recognition, but after it is all over, |
| returned less than 5 minutes later and started to | | | | we are still the same person who stares back in |
| set it all up. All the while that I was preparing, | | | | the mirror, with our own quiver full of strengths |
| Josiah was laughing and giggling at me, and Neville | | | | and weaknesses... no more, no less. And wishing |
| was just standing there looking at me with this | | | | ourselves into another character or strength will |
| very innocent face. | | | | not create them. We may wish that we were |
| "What's so funny?" I asked? Josiah looked at the | | | | smarter, we may wish that we were better |
| woodstove, then looked at me and said "It's | | | | looking, or we may even wish that we were |
| done." "What is?" I asked. Then I looked down and | | | | stronger, but we are what we are, and no |
| saw it. The pad was already under the | | | | amount of wishing will change that: actions will do |
| woodstove and in place. While I was out getting | | | | a lot of it, but wishing won't. We must learn to be |
| the material for my "science experiment", Neville | | | | authentic. |
| had lifted the 400 pound stove by his own brute | | | | To be truly happy in life means accepting who |
| strength, and Josiah had maneuvered the pad into | | | | you are, and what you have to offer. Much has |
| place. I stood there dumbfounded. "How in the | | | | been written on the importance of being yourself, |
| world did you do that?" I stammered, shocked | | | | or being authentic, but it all comes down to your |
| and amazed that he had the strength to do it. | | | | decisions in life. I love what Chuck Swindoll said |
| "That's impossible." "No it isn't" Neville said, you | | | | about this: |
| just have to lift low and close to it, and it's easy". | | | | 1. Know who you are. |
| I have never felt so inadequate in all my days. At | | | | 2. Accept who you are. |
| that moment I felt like that skinny guy that used | | | | 3. Be who you are. |
| to be in all the old comic books. You know the | | | | I would go further and add first, "Learn who you |
| one where this skinny guy is on the beach, and | | | | are". |
| the big strong guy comes by and kicks sand in his | | | | This week, dare to learn who you are so that |
| face and takes his girl. Don't get me wrong, I was | | | | you can be the most authentic person that you |
| extremely grateful that he could help me, and I | | | | can be. Only then can you be truly happy. |
| was totally in awe of his strength, I just felt like a | | | | Make this your best week ever. |
| weak wimp. Actually, I think it was more | | | | |